The difference between dating and marriage
The difference between these two notions seems to be obvious but is it really so?
We from best-matchmaking face people and their personal problems every day and we found out that not everyone understands how dating is different from marriage.
And quite often, this problem becomes the reason for a divorce. So we would love to explain to you the difference between dating and marriage step-by-step in this post.
You will find out why marriage requires more responsibility from you and whether it is easier to be married than single.
What is dating before marriage?
Dating can be truly called preparation for marriage. We are not living in the times when a husband and a wife saw each other at their wedding for the first time, although it’s amazing but such marriages were very strong and people lived happily with each other. Dating before marriage is a must nowadays.
Even in the modern world when people have innovative views on dating and relationships we still face situations when a man comes for the first meeting with a Slavic woman and proposes to her at once.
Of course, women do not accept it and then a man is truly disappointed.
In order not to be rejected at such an early stage, you should go through all the process of dating to get to know your future spouse well. The modern dating scheme gives you unlimited opportunities for that. So dating before marriage is a must in our life and you should not neglect that stage before proposing to someone.
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Dating vs marriage: what really changes?
In fact, almost everything changes in marriage. And the problem is that not all people understand that. Marriage supposes more responsibility. The dating period can be easily called a honeymoon for you two.
At the dating stage, you go out, enjoy life, travel together and then decide to take this important step of marriage. You think that your fairy tale will last forever and you will keep enjoying life till the very end of it. But before thinking of marriage, you should understand what challenges you are going to face in it.
Yes, the first years of marriage will be fine, they will not differ much from your dating period. But later, you will need to change your life, especially if you have babies.
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The main differences between dating and marriage
So below, there are the main differences between dating and marriage.
#1. Marriage means more responsibility
Of course, good men and women should always bear responsibility for each other even at the stage of dating.
Real men are responsible not only for themselves but for their girlfriends as well if they have serious and long-term relationships. But marriage is still different.
When you are officially a husband and a wife, you are supposed to make all the decisions together. Lots of decisions are related to financial issues and you should make all the decisions together. We can truly say that marriage is the ultimate form of commitment.
Marriage can also raise more financial problems which can easily destroy your relationships, so necessary to be ready for that and be able to cope with these problems. It will require you to stay calm and think wise, and if you are not ready for challenges, then better to wait a bit with your marriage.
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#2. Married people often control each other
When you are dating, you often do not live together but just meet, travel, and have dates. Some couples move in and have a common everyday life. If you have lived together in one apartment before marriage, you will be more or less ready for it.
But if not, you should know that now your wife will have access to your phone, messages, laptop, email, and everything else. Your private space will be somehow disturbed now. And quite often, people abuse this extra access to your means of communication and life, in general.
This is human nature – they think that their spouse is their property (which, of course, isn’t true). In marriage, people start having lots of concerns and suspicions and try to check their partner thinking they have a right for that.
But in fact, you should not give your wife any reasons for suspicions and don’t let yourself control her as well. Excessive control is not the norm and both should not allow it. But you should be ready to face it.
#3. Marriage is worth fighting for
While you’re dating, you will have some relationships coming and going. During the dating stage, people are not willing to solve some problems and simply decide to leave. But in marriage, you should work through your problems.
Every married person should be willing to whatever it is necessary to stay together. Of course, in some cases, such as abuse or something like that, there is no sense to do it.
But in most cases, when your relationship is normal, you should do everything to save your marriage.
Marriage is a paradox while it can be both the best and the worst thing that ever happened to you. That’s why it is really important to use dating as an opportunity to get to know your partner as well as possible. It is also important to realize that no one is perfect and accept your partner with her flaws, otherwise, you should not marry.
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Is dating better than marriage?
There is no clear answer to that question. Everything depends on you. If you want to always date and not take any commitment, then yes, dating will be better than marriage. Only serious people who are ready for serious life can marry.
As it was mentioned above, marriage means more challenges than dating and if you do not want to face them, you should not marry at all. Dating is definitely easier than marriage. Yes, the first couple of years of your married life almost nothing will change.
But then, you will need to change your life because when you are married, you cannot already allow yourself to travel as much as you want, partying, and lots of other things. You will have loans, children, and lots of other things to cope with.
Marriage is much better than dating for those who are ready for it and want to put effort into it. And dating is much better for those who are afraid of serious decisions and problems of family life.
What is the hardest part of being married?
This is another rhetorical question. Every couple has its hardest times and parts of their family life. But taking into account our experience, we can say that one of the hardest parts of marriage is the period when you have your first child.
The reason for that is that the couple used to enjoy each other before having a baby. They could do whatever they wanted, travel, go out, partying, etc. But once the child appears in your life, all your life is around that little human. Your life depends on your child, as well as your relationship with your wife.
Quite often, men cannot handle their wives to be busy with the child all the time. She may gain some weight, not look that good at that period, and pay less attention to you. At that stage, lots of divorces happen because men find a single and more beautiful woman. But was this really love then?
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Why is marriage harder than dating?
All the answers to that question were already provided above. Marriage is harder only because it requires more responsibility and can bring you more challenges than dating. It is normal to experience harder times when a young couple is working hard to pay their house out.
Marriage can be harder because you may have children who will not make your life easier than before. Your life changes and for that reason, it might seem to be harder.
But look at different young married couples with children who even manage to travel all together.
The complexity of marriage is only in our heads. If you perceive it as a hard thing, it will be so. If you don’t pay attention to changes and just cope with them knowing that all of them are natural, you will not even notice these challenges.
Is it easier to be single or married?
This is a difficult question while once again, everything depends on you. By nature, human beings cannot exist alone, they need a couple, someone to live with and give birth to children. This is what people are created.
However, some people struggle in marriage; they do not want to bear responsibility and do not like solving different problems. For such people, it is much easier to just date someone casually, they are convenient with it while they always can up their relationships if they are not comfortable with it.
So if you are one of such people, being single will be easier for you. But usually, people are not comfortable with loneliness, they suffer in it and seek for someone. So being single all the time is not natural for people, thus, it is more difficult than being in a marriage.
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Conclusion: Both dating and marriage require efforts and commitment!
We hope that this post will help you realize how marriage is different from dating.
But in fact, any relationship, no matter whether it is legal or not, requires hard work and commitment. If you think dating doesn’t suppose any responsibility, you are wrong, it has its pros and cons as well.
And if you have more questions about Slavic mail order brides, matchmaking, or dating, get in touch with us from best-matchmaking and check our online dating membership and International matchmaking plans at reasonable prices.
We hope it will help you find your love the soonest.
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Written by Katrina El, a practicing psychologist, professional matchmaker and founder of the Slavic marriage agency Best-Matchmaking.com.
Learn more about the matchmaking service by Best-Matchmaking.com